Resilience
We hear the word “Resilience” a lot in Healthcare. The definition of “Resilience” is:
It’s time the general public receive their own “Resilience Training” similar to those on the frontlines. I’ve been compiling my own set of prompts based on the concept of Narrative Medicine. I’m calling it the M.E. (Managing Emotions) First Self-Care Toolkit1 — and while it’s a draft currently, my dream is to develop a fillable PDF for the phone or computer, and possibly a paper workbook or zine that folks can carry around and fill out in-real-life.
Why do we need Resilience?
The audio for this post dives into a bit of my resilience journey. I describe how the need for resilience has changed since before, during, and after the COVID-19 Pandemic (remember, that started a mere 5 years ago). I share the benefit of having a guiding light or port in the storm during uncertain times, and how that strengthened my reserves and tenacity during a global stress test.
What does resilience do?
Resilience allows us to keep showing up. It’s not just a buzzword — it’s a trait. A flavor. A vital sign. Like pulse, blood pressure, pain — resilience gauges our collective ability to keep going — or — the need to STOP. Pause. Rest. Restore.
Resilience reminds us that it is essential to take good care of ME FIRST (yes, even you, the givingest giver. You must put your self first). Taking good care of ME gives me the strength and resilience to do the same for my partner, family, colleagues, community, and planet.
How do we develop resilience?
This is where we differ. We all need resilience at some point in our lives, but the way we get and replenish our resilience will be different for everyone (with some commonalities, as you will soon find). Some people get resilience in solitude — time with a good book, reflective writing, creating or listening to music, crafting, exercising, sleeping. Others channel their resilience in social settings — pairs and groups — going to classes, gathering in cafes, attending concerts, volunteering in schools, attending religious ceremonies, joining gardening clubs.
The medicine that fills up my cup could be poison to someone else. As an extrovert, I am energized by a social situation where I can have conversations and share stories. Introverts might feel drained from the same situation, and should notice that feeling and honor what it’s telling them. I can’t prescribe medicine, but I can tell you what I know about it.
M.E First Self-Care Toolkit Activity
If resilience could be prescribed, we’d all be cured. But, since it’s not a diagnosis with a pharmaceutical treatment, we have to get creative. You might need to do some journaling or talk to your confidants to figure out how to refill your cup. It’s taken me time (a lot of it…) to figure out what “medicines” work for me, how I’ll know when to use them, and who can help in my time of need. I’ve come to realize I was filling my own Toolbox with resources that do this for me — certain songs and playlists, hobbies and activities, people and places. It came together with intention and by accident — to look at it now… it’s really a lovely collection.
With this work in mind, I present to you a few prompts from the M.E. First Self-Care Toolkit so you can begin to compile your own set of self-care tools (copy/paste into a text document or email to keep track).
Grab a piece of paper or type a note on your phone to answer the following questions:
I am the kind of _______________ (Person, Partner, Parent, Professional, etc.) that _______________ (my North Star) would be proud of.
_____________ is my North Star because ________________.
My North Star would be proud of me because _______________.
I am the kind of (Person/Partner/Parent/Professional) who always remembers to _____________ so I can keep showing up.
If I forget or lose sight of my North Star, I can find my way by:
Contacting or surrounding myself with people who nourish me, like (name your confidants, close relations, dear friends, VIP’s): _________________
Doing activities I enjoy by myself, like: __________________
Doing activities I enjoy with others, like: _________________
One thing I will do today or tomorrow that refills/restores/replenishes me is ____________. I commit to doing this ___ times by the end of the day. If I forget or neglect to do so, I will contact an accountability partner (accountabilibuddy) who will help remind me to do what’s good for me.
Bonus Round: Once you’ve completed these prompts, consider emailing or texting a copy to a friend or confidant (especially if it’s someone who nourishes you, like the folks you listed in prompt 5a). If you’d rather keep this to yourself, email it or set a reminder to follow up and reflect on these responses in 1 week, and again in 1 month.
How to help others channel and restore the Collective Resilience
Folks in our lives (friends, family, colleagues, the community) may not know how to channel and restore their resilience. Whether you’ve learned it through experience, professional training, therapy, or tools you’ve compiled into your own kit or collection — these skills are essential and can help others to take good care of themselves.
It’s time we get busy creating ripples of resilience.
Consider the people in your life — the clerk at the pharmacy, a server at the restaurant, the attendant at the carwash, a custodian at the bowling alley — a dear friend, acquaintance, distant relative, or stranger. We’re here together. What if we all did something with the intention of replenishing resilience. For me, for you, for them, and for the land on which we stand.
Imagine the waves we could create — and then we can learn to surf.
We Are All In This Together.
Take good care.
Love,
Jessie
PS: Here’s a song for the road — from the album Writing on the Wall by Wookiefoot, the song Solstice is a reminder to turn your light on.
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